A model for turning chaos into clarity
A.P.E Model
As you can guess by the name of my publication, I prioritize and proceed with Action. If I could, I would like to be an ‘action’ hero….😉
Like yours, my life, in many ways, seems to have taken inspiration from a young Mike Tyson, as it is always trying to knock me down.
In addition to the recommended bobbing and weaving (avoiding people and situations that bring out the lesser version of you), intentional action has always served me well in fighting back.
I choose action because;
Action induces agency, a sense of control.
Action induces inspiration.
And as the Stoics say, “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.
Action becomes the agent of advancement, of progress.
Since I am a nerd, my brain thinks and works in frameworks. I use frameworks to train my reptilian brain and get it out of its usual loop of fear and anxiety. Because this idea was so beneficial, I created the following framework to integrate it into my daily life, and the results have been nothing short of amazing. This model consistently helps me gain clarity and snap out of any anxiety-ridden mind.
I call this model - A.P.E
It has three components.
A: Action
P: Pray/Surrender
E: Enjoy/Endure
I have shared a little about my health battles here before. Over the past four years, I battled a mysterious illness, and no treatment seemed to help. I felt beyond hopeless.
Besides my faith and prayer, this framework helped me keep going and persist.
Why? Because this could always orientate me to the two most essential ingredients of endurance.
Action
Surrender
Action—The first step is always action. What can you do right now to make progress, despite how small it may be?
Whatever the circumstance, think of the smallest action you can take that will create momentum. Sometimes, action isn’t physical; it’s mindset. It can be a positive step towards reframing the situation. That’s action.
Having a hard time losing weight - go for a 5-minute walk.
Stuck in a bad relationship - Write your honest thoughts in a journal for 5 minutes (and burn the page afterward if that helps)
If you wish to start your own business, Talk to three friends about your product and ask for money for it. This will quickly tell you if your service/product has value and what you may need to tweak to get it there.
Life is like chess. To stay in the game and potentially win, you must make your move—take action.
For you to keep fighting, you need to make a move. Take action.
Pray or Surrender
Surrender is the word I prefer for this step, but then the model would have been A.S.E, and it sounds too close to ass ;) So if pray is too triggering a word, think of surrender, letting go, or meditating over the situation.
Surrender doesn’t mean quitting. Quitters sit on their laurels; fighters take action. Once you have done your part and taken the necessary action, you need to let things unfold. Surrender doesn’t mean a defeated attitude. That is why action comes first.
Both Eastern and Western philosophy are steeped in the benefits of Surrender.
This is the central theme in the Bhagavad Gita. Once your karma (action) is done, let the Universe/God/Life unfold.
Christianity teaches us to surrender and practice "Thy will be done."
Stoics believed in Logos and the Goddess of Fortuna (Fortune or Destiny). "Fate leads the willing and drags the unwilling' as the Stoics say.
Western Psychology might refer to surrender as compassionate observation, meeting life where it is, without judgment.
Again, I recognize the gift of free will. Hence, step 1 is action.
Surrender creates space for reassessment. A post-game analysis, if you will, once you have done what you could.
E - Enjoy or Endure
You took action, surrendered, and waited for things to unfold. Now, there are only two possibilities.
Either things panned out in your favor, in which case, Enjoy.
If they didn’t, Endure and get back to Step 1 - Action.
Rinse and Repeat.
In the darkest of times, this model pulled me out of the depths of despair. It reminded me that I still have work to do, which is my purpose: to find what I can do to make things better for myself and others.
There were days when the only action I could take was to maintain a positive attitude about the future and not give in. There were other days when playing with my daughter for 10 minutes meant the day was a win.
This model provided clarity in finding these small wins.
To this day, this is an exercise I do daily in my morning journaling routine.
Every day, I write down critical situations I am dealing with and map out which stage I need to focus on. Is it the Action phase or the Surrender phase? Maybe it’s celebration time because something worked out. Or it’s reminding myself that ‘this too shall pass’ and I must endure it.
I hope you give it a try.
Implement the idea 💡
For the next 7 days, write down a challenging situation and map it using this model.
Which step must you implement: Action, Pray/Surrender, or Enjoy/Endure?
I urge you to give this a go.
Much Love
PM
PS: This idea has been such a game-changer for me that I have decided to publish it as a daily journal. Stay tuned for more …
This is a great and interesting model to make the most of life.
Sorry to hear about your disease but it's inspiring how you handle it. Cheers!